Brand New Day?

Well, that only worked with Spider-Man, after he cut that deal with Mephisto and started over, free from his mistakes from the past, even thought he "deal" kind of backfired, after all, instead of moving on, he is what he always was, a "loser". I´m going to put the comic book analogy aside, after all, my point can have something in common but not that much.


I agree things is a little better, since last week but I feel, I´ve been feeling like I´m walking in circles, that I´ve been walking in circles, Have I? Unfortunately I am.


It´s pretty funny and even peculiar, when we (in my case I) want something so bad that we create a illusion, a fantasy that only we (I) can see it. Little by little I´ve been seeing it, day by day it´s been showing to me what I want, what I desire is just an illusion, pure and simple.


The difference between I want and I will have is huge, like miles and miles and no matter how much I walk through it, I´ll never get there, when I´m just about there, it goes fast and I lose touch.


Como eu queria poder saber se ela gosta de mim, mesmo ela dizendo que sim (mentira).


That´s the point, I will never get that illusion, always , like that the Primitives song: I almost touched you, always, always, always...

I Have A Vague Idea...

Last week was a little confused, I had so many problems and misunderstandings that i really wanted to erase Thursday and Friday from the face of Earth.


My mom got sick and almost died and I think I lost a important person, I have that idea, after all, I lost contact and because of a stupid question I asked. I wish I cold have managed better that situation but i act out of fear, I might be wrong, I hope I´m wrong but I can´t talk to her and tomorrow, a fantastic and beautiful present I sent to her will arrive, she will get it and I really don´t know if she will accept or even will want any of my presents, I really don´t know and I fear that, she is a great friend and since, we´ve been without talking for almost three days and I only got one e-mail responding from her, indicating nothing.


I´m really sad and down, I can´t believe I´ll lose her, out chats and everything. I´m.. I´ve been trying to face that possibility, of not be able to talk to her but it´s so hard, so hurting that I can´t even be awake, and there is my mom, still sick and facing a disease.


I have to wait, tomorrow will be the day, after all, she will have to respond if the present arrived and I was, am so happy giving her that and now it, it´s my life, after all, I´m sorrow´s native son (Thanks Morrisey for the title).


Today will be long and painful night, and tomorrow too, the day will be like today, full of uncertainties and fear, I lost her, I´m quite sure and unlike my dubious thought tricks on me, she will never talk to me again.

Róisín Murphy.

This Sunday, as usual, I had nothing better to do, after reforming my studio, not a reforming, just change and cleaning up, I ended up like always, nothing better to do so, another time for the 10,000,000 times I listened Róisín Murphy.


It´s been like a habit, since i discovered her more than a year ago, back when I had no problem and I wasn´t that down, waiting for someone who will never come anyway, I can´t help myself, It´s like automatic, her songs have a positive power over me, when I need energy I listen and I´m ready for another day.


I really want to see her live, I´ve never had the chance and I hope she comes to Brazil someday, or I can go to UK or wherever place she is playing. It´s a dream I want to make come true.


One again Róisín, thanks for making my day bearable and pleasant, after all, we don´t know each other but like your song says, my favorite song by the way, You know me better than I know myself, you know me the best.

I Hate Sundays!

I HATE SUNDAYS! It´s notorious, I really do. Since early age I associate Sunday with bad and sick things, I have my reasons and sickness is one of the related things that make Sunday a bad day to me.


It´s also the worst day to watch TV. Yeah! Here we have those re-runs of the weak´s TV series and the traditional Program Silvio Santos ( Silvio Santos Show). Which I hate from the guts.


At least, Sunday is almost ending, only 4 hours to go but while I´m writing it, will kill some time .


Well, It´s okay, Sunday is necessary, to balance the World order and to permit workers to have a resting day but no matter, I hate Sunday and I will always hate. I believe I will, I´m not sure.


I´m always worried about a friend, which is making the day a little more difficult to digest or to endure but It´s okay, I think so.

New Year (Again?)

Well, it´s almost new year, and once again I´m making plains for this new year. I´m not a type of guy who makes plains, in fact I´m more like live and see what will happen person. This year I have some plains, I really do and one of them is to see my novel published.


I´m pretty confident this time, some light at the end of the tunnel and a concrete possibility of that happens so, maybe this time ( in fact) this time is for real.


No more be fooled by the others. I learned that this Christmas and after that, no more. I let myself be fooled but I´ve learned my lesson so, good by Mr. Nice Person.


My return to university. Yeah, I will, languages and to improve my English more. That´s something I´ve been postponing for a while but this year is different, I will go and take my degree.


I can see I´m a different person already. happy new year to me and to those who will read it. A new life is waiting for me and I´ll enjoy each and every minute of it.

The Head on The Door.

Behind that door, I´ll finally have the chance to meet someone who has been so important to me, so nice, which I never thought I could have that chance, now it´s time and I´m ready, at least I think I am.


I open the door and I see a beautiful white room, very large but with any furniture in it, just a big leather arm chair and siting there, my beloved Kathy is waiting for me. She is as gorgeous as ever, wearing a beautiful white dress, high hills and those earrings I sent to her. Her smile, I can´t resist it, she has a genuine and happy smile, not to mention those eyes, which I fell for them since I saw her photo. I feel Like I am in another dimension, in fact, I´m feeling I´m in heaven, I can´t stop smiling, I also can´t wait to listen her voice, her southern accent. I have so many things to say, to tell and finally I´m having the opportunity, to meet her, not that I haven´t ,we know each other so well, I can say, just like Róisín Murphy song, which is my all time favorite " You Know Me Better": You know me better than I know myself, you know me the best. We´ve been so close that I really don´t know what I might do without her, without our chats, without her sweetness, she is so important and I can for sure say I can´t live without her.


I remember when I found your song, the lyrics demonstrates what we really feel for each other, "If you lose your faith baby, you can have mine, because we walk on the same line". Pretty accurate, we indeed walk on the same line. Now I´m deeply nervous, looking at her, seeing how gorgeous she is, I take a deep breath and I am ready but something is wrong, I can´t move.



I´m paralysed, I really don´t know why. I can move, she haven´t noticed it, maybe she thinks I´m nervous but It´s more than that, and the worst part is I really don´t know why. It´s like some spell, some magic because I want to come close to her but I just can´t. I´m desperate, after some time to finally reach that point and now I just can´t I´m going to lose our first date and I can´t help it.


She stands up, still smiling and now she is coming to me, touching her silky blond hair and coming close and I´m still paralysed, but happy because I am only a few steps to give her a big hug and a big kiss. Suddenly, I woke up, and she is gone. In fact it was just a dream, nothing but a dream. I start feeling sad, frustrated. I was so close to meet her, my sweet Kathy and It was nothing but a dream. Why? I really don´t know. It was so vivid, so real and ended up a dream, nothing but a dream.



I´m devastate, so sad that It was only a dream. I decide what I´m going to do. I lay my head on the door and I wait to fall sleep again, hopping I´ll once again dream of you my beloved Kathy, with our first date and praying for this time, my dream will have a happy end.




This is for you Kathy. I hope you like this short story. As a matter of fact, It´s based on a dream I had, even though the dream ended like that, I woke up so happy, after all, dream of you was really one of the pleasant dreams I´ve ever had. Thanks for being so important and so amiable. I really love you from the deepest of my heart.


Kisses.

Follow Friday.

@beingnobody

@thecraigmorris

@evanafter

@jhaninah25

@KimbalandND

@iRachey

@beth_lunn

@dreamsentinel

@rearviewmirror7

@Moonflowerchild

@lookitslizzle

@SuperPanda89

@marianadourado

@Morimore

@flogance

@sheba4005

@JaymeROXann

@Mieldazis

@randomfurlong

@xmennation


Follow Friday those amazing and extraordinary friends.